


Bits and Bobs from Tumblr and Beyond

by argyros (argentumluna)



Category: Katekyou Hitman Reborn!, Tennis no Oujisama | Prince of Tennis
Genre: Gen, M/M, and drunken ideas, now including crossovers!
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-23
Updated: 2017-06-10
Packaged: 2018-09-19 09:54:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9434822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/argentumluna/pseuds/argyros
Summary: Chapter 1:  Fake relationship, Sanada/Yukimura secret agentsChapter 2: Butler AUChapter 3: The Tezuka dating simChapter 4: KHR Xover - Yukimura awakens his FlameChapter 5: Figure skating AU





	1. #7, fake relationship. sanada/yukimura

**Author's Note:**

  * For [fulminata](https://archiveofourown.org/users/fulminata/gifts).

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where they go undercover.

“This setup has a 87% probability of success.” Yanagi, indicating a graph on his presentation with a laser pointer, looks over at his two very sceptical colleagues. “87%,” he repeats. “The highest of all possible scenarios.” Yukimura seems as if he can’t decide whether he’s annoyed or amused, while Sanada looks fit to burst a vein.

 

“Does it have to be the both of you, was what you were about to ask,” Yanagi adds, when Yukimura opens his mouth to say something. “Yes. Seiichi, you and Genichirou are the only two available operatives with the requisite skillset.” He can see Sanada exhaling slowly, signaling his grudging acceptance. Yukimura looks at Yanagi for a long moment, eyes glittering, before nodding once. They are professionals, after all.

 

“Good.” Yanagi steps forward, holding out folders and IDs. “Your glitzy gay wedding awaits you in Las Vegas.”

 

Months later, when the objective has long been met and the world is once again safe from insane billionaire villains, Yanagi catches Yukimura laying his head on Sanada’s shoulder. Sanada smiles gently back. _Finally,_ he thinks. _Mission accomplished._


	2. 3 sentence fic prompt: Butler AU, Teatime, Sanada/Yukimura

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yukimura's daily life is punctuated by Sanada, through tea.

At 7.30 AM, Yukimura gently wakes to the scent of Darjeeling, wafting from the porcelain cup set soundlessly on his nightstand. At 3PM, the appearance of jade-green gyokuro, accompanied by one of those traditional sweets Sanada is surprisingly good at making, reminds Yukimura to take a break from his work. At 11PM, it’s chamomile after a long evening of entertaining, spiced rooibos for a cold night, or apple tea if he’s just feeling contrary and childish, handed to him by a gloved hand without Yukimura ever having to say a single word.


	3. TezukaKunimitsuRomanticChristmas.exe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Written for @geniuskaktus as part of the xmasouji Christmas fanwork exchange on Tumblr.

**PROLOGUE**

Christmas Eve.

No one would publicly admit their lack of romantic obligations, but a certain student tennis forum was unusually active.

At 11.59 PM, just as the clock ticked over to midnight, a file was uploaded:

Subject title: “Merry Christmas”

 

TezukaKunimitsuRomanticChristmas.exe

 

UR WELCOME

The original poster, username 072065082085, seemed to be a new account with no prior posts. Despite the fishiness of it all and the potential danger of viruses or malware, the siren song of the name Tezuka Kunimitsu (and the rather beguiling thumbnail) proved too much to resist.

**MIZUKI**

… It appeared to be some kind of game. One of those visual novels, a dating sim, to be exact.

Clicking through the story, Mizuki scoffed at the stilted writing and cheesy dialog. Admittedly though, the rather expertly photoshopped stills of Tezuka were quite something. Mizuki hadn’t realised there were that many non-blurry pictures of Tezuka, who was notoriously difficult to photograph. The music was really terrible though, clearly some inferior royalty-free stuff.

No matter. Mizuki was skilled, Mizuki was determined, and he would get _all_ the Tezuka CGs. He was now down to one final Christmas scene, where he (the main character) was about to present game-Tezuka with a gift to win his love.

Obviously, Mizuki went for the fishing rod. Tezuka’s love of fishing was well-known. He made the appropriate selection, and just about fell off his chair as a giant, zoomed-in image of Konjiki Koharu’s pouty lips congratulated him on ‘netting himself a hot hunk’.

**OISHI & KIKUMARU**

After inviting himself over to complain at Oishi about not having a girlfriend, eating dinner (and snacks and dessert), rolling all over Oishi’s room and commandeering his computer, Kikumaru downloaded the suspiciously titled file out of boredom, despite Oishi’s protestations.

Ignoring Oishi’s hovering and increasingly strangled exclamations, Kikumaru happily clicked at the game, making whatever choices he thought would net him the girl–no, Tezuka. So weird. But really funny. Tezuka liked cake, right? He didn’t look like the type, but everybody liked cake. Especially Christmas Cake. Kikumaru would give him all the cake. See? He was doing well. Tezuka-buchou was agreeing to meet him for a Christmas date ( _sooo_ weird). Still, Kikumaru felt kind of excited. Meeting a girl for Christmas had to be something like that, yeah? So it was practice, sort of. Sitting forward, Kikumaru clicked the option to confess to his one true digital love.

On-screen Tezuka vanished, only to be replaced by cake, cake and more cake.

Hey, this was pretty good too.

**ATOBE**

This had to be illegal. Atobe should inform Tezuka, mobilize his lawyers, track down this miscreant and sue every stitch of clothing off him.

Atobe downloaded it anyway.

Despite the shoddy craftsmanship and unethical use of Tezuka’s image, this…game…had a certain charm to it. Taking Tezuka out to dinner, discussing fishing bait under the stars, these were all admirable things to aspire to (admirable things that only Atobe was fit to aspire to). Sadly, there was no option to sweep Tezuka into a private jet for a tropical holiday in the Maldives. Atobe settled for inviting Photoshop Tezuka to a classy Christmas ball.

Finally, the in-game Christmas event, where Tezuka would show up in a handsome tuxedo. Atobe selected the option to meet his date at the specified location, only to be confronted with the mind-searing image of the Seigaku coach in a ball gown that looked rather disturbingly like lingerie.

There was no save to reload, no ability to regret his choices and restart the game, only a drooping, poorly-animated heaving bosom barely restrained by pink chiffon. Atobe dry-heaved and unplugged his computer.

**FUJI**

Ah.

He had known, the moment he downloaded the program, who this was from and what it was for. After all, every one of the edited images originated from Fuji’s private collection (which he didn’t remember ever sharing with the creator, but that was a transgression for another day). The deconvolution was superb, though, better than what he could do on his own. 

Sadly, Fuji didn’t have time to appreciate the finer, un-blurred details of this art. As the CG stills went by, Fuji diligently picked out the tiny cacti embedded within, sometimes one, sometimes two, hidden in the wallpaper, in picture frames or on backpacks. In turn, the dialogue options disappeared, leaving simply a story that marched ever on.

It went something like this.

Tezuka, a cactus fairy, had descended to the mortal realm into the body of a tennis-playing junior high-schooler to learn the meaning of true love.

Despite the amusing (and oddly compelling) premise, Fuji rather thought the story quite lacking. And there were not nearly enough cacti. Still, he smiled when on Christmas Eve, the Tezuka-fairy accepted the meaning of love and dissolved into pink sparkles, transferring his immortal soul into a cactus to repay Fuji for his education in the fine art of confessing one’s love next to a trash can.

He watched the scene fade to the end credits, where there was a little message right at the end:

“Merry Christmas - Inui S

P.S. Sorry for sitting on your cactus. It was an accident.

P.P.S. I promise I bought you a new one.

P.P.P.S. Can I have my notebooks back?”

Merry Christmas, indeed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry.


	4. (KHR crossover) Phoenix

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yukimura refuses to die.

His body is shutting down. Every breath is more laborious than the last, and he can barely think through the haze of pain. Distantly, he hears the medical staff rush around him as the monitors’ beeps crescendo into an urgent wail.

With his last fading thoughts, he thinks of Rikkai, of Akaya and Renji and Genichirou, of the sun on his face and the weight of a racket in his hand. He remembers blood, sweat, and the sweet taste of victory, and decides -- _I refuse to die._

Something smoldering deep within him unfurls, stoked into a blazing inferno in answer to his resolve, and Yukimura loses himself to the searing heat.

When he awakens, the doctors tell him it is a miracle. His body has stopped trying to attack itself, and his disease appears to be in full remission. Within two weeks, he’s out of the hospital, as good as new-- or better. 

His team is overjoyed at his return, despite the brutal corrections Yukimura makes to their forms, which have inevitably got a bit sloppy with his absence. They’re all somewhat reluctant to leave his side these days, especially Akaya, who follows him around like an adorable but somewhat annoying puppy. 

His first real match after his hospital release, Yukimura re-discovers his fire of rebirth. His already despairing opponent falls to his knees as Yukimura’s intimidating aura multiplies a hundredfold, eyes aglow like the setting sun. 

(Later, Akaya swears that Yukimura-buchou was literally _on fire_.)

Not a day later, the Italian mafia arrives in Kanagawa.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yukimura will continue to play tennis (and win) with his Dying Will.
> 
> He has Sky flames here. I've chosen to see Yukimura's illness as an autoimmune disease, which is where the body's immune system attacks itself. Since the attribute of Sky flames is Harmony, awakening them essentially meant pulling his body back in harmony with itself.


	5. Ice Skating AU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How Yukimura Seiichi Met His Shady Coach.

Yukimura Seiichi always had a problem with authority.

This was _partially_ to blame for his current predicament. 

Two years ago, Yukimura had burned a lot of bridges in his quest for perfection, and now he could not find a coach. Well, that was not strictly correct, as some (specifically, those who had never experienced Yukimura firsthand) were at least intrigued by the possibility of training a (former) internationally competitive athlete. 

Half a conversation later, when it became clear that Yukimura had very exacting opinions and would not be persuaded otherwise, the response invariably came to this:

“It’s a shame, but I don’t think I’m the right person to do this.” 

...He really didn’t need a coach anyway, Yukimura thought, slowly skating slightly wobbly figures into the ice. He’d have to find a bigger rink eventually though, something close to Olympic-sized…

“You shouldn’t be out on the ice yet, Yukimura-kun.” 

Yukimura snapped his head around at the voice which had interrupted his thoughts. A nondescript salaryman type stood rinkside, looking quietly at him. Something about his gaze made Yukimura feel like a fish being picked over by housewives at the market. The man held out a business card as Yukimura skated over with a speculative gleam in his eyes. 

“...You’re a...certified public accountant,” Yukimura read out, disbelieving. 

“Yes,” the man-- Yanagi, confirmed, unperturbed, as if accountants critiqued figure skating all the time. “I coach here on weekends, which includes tomorrow, from 8am to 12pm. Stop by, if you like.”

As Yukimura tried to process the fact that an accountant was probably offering to coach him, Yanagi picked up his briefcase. “Also, perhaps you should finish your physical therapy before you break an ankle trying to skate.” Then he was gone.

_What_ , thought Yukimura.

That night, he slept badly, half-dreaming of synchronized figure skating accountants with calculators and hefty binders full of paperwork. In the morning, a very irritated, cranky, yet curious Yukimura flicked on his iPad and typed in the accountant’s name into a search bar. 

Huh. Anyone could be a coach, it seemed. This Yanagi _was_ JSF-certified, and seemed to have some skating history-- juniors pairs, mostly, donkey’s years ago, some international competitions where he qualified but didn’t medal. There was also some old article where he was listed as the new coach of some kid who got banned from competing for a couple years due to violence. This was truly scraping the very bottom of the barrel, but Yukimura was running out of options.

At the very least, it wouldn’t hurt to take a look.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yukimura's been out of commission for about two years thanks to illness.


End file.
